Discontent.
August 25, 2008 11:11 a.m.
Today has dragged on. Typical I�m sure for someone just returning from a much needed vacation but I feel like something is missing today. I don�t feel whole. I feel scattered and not all here. My mind is wandering as it has been these past several weeks. The �What If�s� continue to scare me. I can�t sleep at night� I wake up at least 3 times during the night, sometimes I wake up cold and discontent, sometimes I wake up hot and thirsty.
I haven�t had a goodnights sleep in some time now. It is definitely taking a toll on my body, my perception of sleep and awake is walking a very thin line. I feel�. Zombiefied, that�s not even a word, but the sentiment is still the same, I don�t want to continue to just �exist�. I want more.
I�m sorry if my words seem incoherent, it probably has a lot to do with my recent state of mind.